Check-up: 7 Years

Yesterday was Dan and my 7th anniversary. It was incredibly anticlimactic and without much celebration. Dan and I both worked, we exchanged cards and candy, and got some ice cream. We had planned to do an overnight trip to Cape May earlier this summer as a special anniversary treat, but it didn't work out so we need to do a redemption celebration before the fall weather steals away our moment. Mandy gifted us a full day date so we just need to commit to something special.

2020 was rough and in many ways 2021 felt the same way but I'm proud of how Dan and I have worked together as a team to get the family through. I love him so much and I know he loves me. That confidence has been our stability throughout this year.

Today, I'm posting our little relationship check-up which we are doing annually now.

See our previous check-ups here:

6 months
1 year
18 months
2 years
2 1/2 years
3 years
3 1/2 years
4 years 

5 years  

6 years

We always answer the same set of questions but we do it separately and we don't look at previous answers, so similarities are coincidental. 

7 years:

1) What is your favorite memory of the last year?

Dan: Christmas Day at our house with the kids
Steph: celebrating Christmas in our home for the first time

2) What is your favorite part of parenthood so far? 

 

Dan: Watching Kip and Ivy interact with each other, and their little hugs and kisses

Steph: sweet toddler conversations

 

3) Something you weren't expecting about parenthood. 

 

Dan: How much the four year old wants to be a one year old and the one year old wants to be a four year old. 

Steph: How much you'll see the bad parts of yourself reflected in your children and figuring out how to work on that so it doesn't get passed along for generations

4) Something you were pleasantly surprised by about marriage or parenthood.

Dan: How we support each other's parenting decisions. And how during times of intense stress we are still able to be there for each other instead of letting it drive us apart
Steph: How unconditional love and forgiveness abounds

5) Something you learned about your partner after becoming a parent.

Dan: How her confidence as a parent has grown over time especially amid the stress of the pandemic with a newborn
Steph: How his calm presence and patient spirit holds this family together

6) Something to work on as a parent and a partner.

Dan: Boundaries with Kip and being more intentional about planning adventures with Steph
Steph: All around Patience

7) Something to look forward to.

Dan: Making friends with other parents at Kip's school and doing more adventures now that Ivy is walking.
Steph: Watching Kip's introduction to school and being involved in the classroom.

8) Favorite thing about your partner right now.

Dan: Her creativity and willingness to listen to me.

Steph: The depth of his patience for me and the kids. He always has an ear to listen and a heart to help.

This is one of my favorite wedding photo of us and when does one have an occasion to share a wedding photo except on an anniversary???

Happy 7 Years, Dan. I'm proud of the family we've created. Here's to 77x7 more. 

Weekending it

I took Thursday and Friday off of work last week to try and squeeze in some more family time before summer ends. With going back to work in the office and Kip starting school, the end of summer has never felt so mournful to me. We were able to do a lot this summer and we certainly had fun but it was a hard summer too. Grandpa, the pandemic, more and more transitions. I just wanted some more happy memories free of work stress. 

The original plan was for Dan and I to take the kids to the pool on Thursday but unfortunately they closed our pool during the week due to a lack of lifeguards. BOOOO. It was a really, really hot day too and would have been perfect for the pool. Instead, we took them to the park in the morning and got donuts.

In the afternoon, I spent an hour setting up the blow-up pool in the backyard and hauling water from the garage. It was a lot of work but the kids had fun and so did Dan and I.

On Friday, Dan took off work as well and we all headed to Long Branch beach for the day. Well, the day trip turned into just a few hours trip. It was really hot and despite being by the water, it wasn't very refreshing. All was fun and games until one kid got their finger pinched in some sunglasses and the other kid got splashed with a wave. We were back home by 12:30. It was a bit of a disappointment but we gave it a try and we all liked the quality of the beach and will certainly come again when circumstances are better. We also lucked out with both kids sleeping on the drive home and a stop at Shake Shack for lunch. I'm trying to be better about finding the silver lining in crummy situations.

Saturday it rained all day. We've had such a wet summer, plus the heat and it often feels like we live in the tropics. Saturday was boring all around and we couldn't even get the kids out for a walk. 

Sunday we did all our weekend chores and managed multiple meltdowns from Kip. I think he is feeling the end of summer creep and nerves about starting school. For a special treat, Dan took him to get a "purple drink" from Sonic. 

We are in the one week countdown of summer! Hold on tight.

Tails and Tales

In late June our local library finally reopened for browsing. Previously it was just pick-up service so we had never even seen the library for nearly the whole year we've lived here. I'm really glad it reopened because it's a quick walk from our house and they have a really cute kid's section. We signed Kip up for the summer reading program Tails and Tales and took both kids several times this summer to pick a few books and play with some of the toys. Kip even participated in a couple of the crafts.

Dan used to take Kip to the library in Brooklyn pretty often. It was always pretty crowded. In South Amboy, we've only ever encountered one or two other families while there so it's nice when it is so small and the librarians get to know you. 

Kip finished the reading program and raked in a bunch of junk prizes which he loved. Evidently he was one of two that had finished the program as of last week. 

Anyways, I hope for lots more library days in the future and it will be especially nice for Dan and Mandy to have somewhere to take Ivy for a bit while Kip is at school.

Getting Ready for School

AHHHHH! We are now less than two full weeks way from Kip's first day of school!! I'm so excited for him but I'm also really nervous about all of it and I wish we didn't still have the pandemic to add to the mix. Ugh. But we're pushing through.

This spring/summer we've talked with Kip a lot about going to school and he goes back and forth between complete refusal to go, asking questions and seeming interested, and some tiny hints of excitement.

Back in mid-July, while Dan was in Kansas, I took Kip (along with Ivy) to the New Student Ice Cream Social they had one afternoon. It was hot. I drove the kids by myself for the first time ever. We had stroller drama and I eventually had to lug Ivy the whole time. Despite my own chaos, it ended up being a really small intimate event as only four families attended (including us). We got a tour of the school, Kip met and talked with the principal and school counselor, and we left with a backpack loaded with school supplies. Kip won the raffle and got a basket full of baking supplies and he also got to play on the playground. Seeing the school really helped him and he seemed excited after that.

Yesterday I took Kip to the short Pre-K Orientation. We've had such little communication from the school in general so I was really glad there was an in-person orientation day. Dan stayed home with Ivy so I could focus just on Kip and make sure he felt safe and got plenty of attention. I think the school administrators were a bit unprepared for the number of parents and kids that showed up. Kip was bored and restless during the initial announcement part and I agree it was a bit much for all those kids that age to sit for 30 minutes. But, eventually we got to go check out the classrooms. I was trying to spot Kip's name on a cubby or something to have an idea of where he would be and who his teacher is but I didn't see his name so I think that means he's in the room that wasn't set-up yet? I don't know. Hopefully we find out today or get some kind of email soon with legit information. I'm trying not to be overly frustrated. Anyways, after the tour they let the kids play on the big playground and Kip loved it.

 

 

It sounded like there are five pre-k classes. Two classes are in another building and are for the kids that have IEPs? That's my guess based on bits I pieced together. The other three classes are in the main elementary building. Breakfast and lunch are provided and there is a 45 minute rest time after lunch.

We, of course, didn't know anyone there but I did recognize one little boy that Kip had played with at the playground once this summer. I'm looking forward to Kip making some friends and for us to make some parent friends as well.

 

Ugh, I can't believe we are finally starting school. Four years went by so quickly but holding my little feisty Kippy baby feels like a lifetime ago.

 

 

Weekending it

This past weekend before we got pelted with rain from Henri, we had visitors from Brooklyn. These friends are the only ones that have stayed in touch with us since we left our home church in Bay Ridge. Their friendship means a lot to us even though we see them, maybe, once a year. This little outdoor play date had been talked about and rescheduled so many times but we finally made it happen and we made it count.

Kip was so excited we arrived at our meeting place, like 45 minutes early.

And then our friends arrived. We did the beach, playground, and pool!

We a great day outside doing all the things which made having to stay indoors with two days of rain not so bad.

I can't believe there are only two weekends left before school begins.

Home Sweet Home | 1 Year

This past weekend marked one year since we moved to our first home in New Jersey!

I dug into the archives for this one!

Look at itty bitty Ivy! She was just three months old. Woof, that was a hard day and it's been a wild year. So many major life transitions and some big first-time homeowner learning curves, but we made it! I couldn't get cooperation for a photo recreation but this will do...little Kippy on our front stoop.

There are so many things to love about our home, here are just a few.

- Extra space and room to grow

- Separate kids bedrooms

- Garage multipurpose space

- Easy access to the outdoors

- Ability to grill

- Beautiful places to walk

- Proximity to a huge beautiful park and public waterfront/beach

- Community pool

- Clean streets (no piles of festering garbage!)

- Small town feel but close to the city

- Access to shopping and full-sized/well-stocked grocery stores

- Trees and nature and animals right outside our windows

- Driveway and yard for playing and gardening

- Full basement with full bathroom for Mandy

- Less noisy, less crowded BUT not distant or lonesome 

- House projects (as long as they aren't $$$)

- Decorating

- Ability to work from home in a quiet separate space from the kids

- Diversity (I was worried we lost that when we moved but we didn't SA is very diverse)

We do miss Brooklyn but Dan and I have talked a lot about how we mainly miss pre-pandemic Brooklyn and that lifestyle and the things we loved are gone. There is no going back even if we still lived there. When I think about the work from home situation and kid dynamic from this past year, I truly cannot imagine how we would have made that work in the apartment. Could we have lived there happily with two kids? Yes, I'm sure of it. But we never factored a pandemic and my working from home for over a year. Add a newborn and a toddler. Yeah, in terms of mental health, moving was essential and we are very aware of how God's hand worked into the circumstances of last year and made it possible for us to find and afford this home. It wasn't easy but it was a gift. If we had tried to find a home this year at the same time? We would be out of the market due to the way the home prices in this neighborhood have soared. It was God's provision, 100%.

 

But just for the sake of nostalgia, these are the things I miss most about Bay Ridge:

- Close friends close by 

- Vivi Bubble Tea

- Ability to walk to Rite Aid for something quick

- Tap class

- Steve's bagels

- A more lively business district with lots of great restaurant options 

Some of these things we've solved. There is a Vivi bubble tea not too far away in an Asian grocery store that Dan sometimes treats me to a pick-up. When my parents were here my Dad picked Dan up in Bay Ridge and they got a dozen+ bagels from Steve's and we froze them. Genius, duh! We'll be doing that regularly now. Downtown South Amboy is a little dull but the area is expanding and that will hopefully draw more business. Plus, we don't eat in restaurants anymore (thanks pandemic) so we got used to our loss of Indian and SoCal tacos pretty quick before we even left Bay Ridge. I miss tap dance but my studio closed permanently in late March 2020, so there was no going back anyways. As for Rite Aid, well yes, I do miss telling Dan to run down the block to get a candy bar or Gatorade but we've gotten used to that and it helps to be able to get everything we need for the week in one grocery trip.

On the whole, we've adjusted to suburban life. We love our home. We are looking forward to digging roots and plugging into Kip's school community. Hopefully, eventually, finding a church to attend and making friends. So much is still in flux and this dang pandemic keeps holding on but right now, we're happy, healthy, grateful, and settled.

Ivy || 15 Months Old

Trying to keep track and update on Ivy's development the same way I did with Kip.

Today, Ivy turns 15 months old!! Fully toddler in every single way.

Ivy at 15 months

Weight: 22 lbs. 2 oz. (21 lbs. 11.2 oz. at 12 months) 

Height: 31.5 inches (31.57 inches at 12 months) 

*these 15 month stats are likely off, she was not cooperative at the check-up*

Personality: Sensitive and sweet

 

Here is a little recap of the last three months.

 

13 Months

 

Started climbing on things and into things

Clapping

Attempting to put on clothes by pressing shirts and shorts into her belly

Discovered her belly button

Tantrums (eeek! body flailing and screaming mad fits)

Desperately obsessed with fruit

Practicing walking while pushing her stroller

Her "hidey hole" under Kip's school table 

First word "Dada" June 3, 2021

Climbed up on the couch June 7, 2021

Pointing June 7, 2021

Coloring

Throwing balls

Saying "eese" (cheese) June 10, 2021

Hugging Mama

Trying to put shoes on

 

Favorite activity: Going outside, water table, riding on the push car

Ivy's biggest milestone at 13 months was being night weaned and started "sleeping through the night." Lord, it was a long road but after two nights of screaming for over an hour, followed by couple of nights of later wake-ups, another week of sporadic bad nights and now she will put herself back to sleep instead of being nursed all hours of the night. 

 

At 13 months, Ivy took a trip to the beach, saw Grandma and Grandpa, and went to Storybook Land and the community pool for the first time!

 

14 Months

 

Standing up unassisted without pulling up onto anything 

Balanced standing

Assisted walking with only one hand for support

First independent step July 3 and 4 2021

Said "Mama" July 3, 2021

Starting using a fork successfully 

Regularly saying "hi"

Being a tattle tale on Kip

Hugging her dolls

Attempting to climb stairs

Putting train track pieces together independently

Pointing out birds and bunnies

Excitement when she sees Ginko crab from Tumble Leaf

Favorite activity: Putting shoes on and going outside

Ivy was SO close to walking on her own this month, she was more stable and secure but she just needed that last little bit of confidence to let go of support. Unfortunately, she regressed in sleep training and night nursing. Sigh.

At 14 months, Ivy met Auntie Jess for the first time, went to Storybook Land again, went to Northlandz train layout twice, enjoyed the baby pool, rode on a real steam engine!

 

15 Months

 

Walking independently unassisted beginning August 4, 2021

Enjoys pulling out books and "reading"

Lover of tiny animals like bunnies and birds and squirrels 

Hater of large animals like cows and mules

Imitating Kip

Putting together itty bitty Legos

Making train noises 

Playing with cars

Favorite activity: Snacks at the pool

Ivy's biggest milestone this month was becoming a walker! It took her about a month from first independent step to full fledged walking around but that's what it took for her confidence to bloom. She was also 90% weaned this month. It happened quickly and emotionally and the silver lining was she re-night trained herself.

 

At 15 months, Ivy went to the library for the first time, got a visit with Marmee and Poppa, saw large farm animals in real life for the first time, spent her first nights away from mom, and became an advanced elite clinger.

 

Sleep

Ivy goes to bed around 6 PM and generally wakes up around 6 AM. She does wake in the night fairly often but she either cries and then settles or we go in and cuddle/rock her for a bit. She takes one nap a day around 10:30 AM for about two hours. She dropped to one nap much quicker than Kip did but it ultimately helped her sleep in general.

 

Eat

Ivy still nurses once a day in the morning. If I'm around, I might nurse her in the afternoon but that is fairly inconsistent now that I'm back at work in the city part-time. She does not like drinking cows milk but she will eat milk with cereal and loves yogurt and cheese. Ivy is a fairly picky eater. Fruit is her love language and would love to eat that exclusively. Blueberries, strawberries, watermelon, mandarin oranges, raspberries, apples/applesauce, she loves it all. She also loves whole fruit Popsicles, juice, and anything with a fruity flavor. She has a sweet tooth.

 

Play

Ivy is really interesting to watch play. Because she is around Kip so much, she is really interested in his toys and how he plays. She loves putting train tracks together, works really hard to assemble Duplos, and recently started playing with matchbox cars. Ivy has plenty of her own toys but she aims for the more advanced options. She adores going outside and loves water play of any type. Her fine motor skills are ace!

Talk 

Ivy communicates really well with high pitch shrill screaming. Ugh. She also points, grunts, and moves to what she wants you to help her with. She listens and responds to commands like "find your shoes" or "where's your baby," and she also babbles constantly as well as says a few words. 

 

Ivy Bean, you are such a sweet little cuddly lamb. We adore you pixie pie!