Weekending it

Sometimes our weekends just feel so ordinary that I often don't see the point in posting anything about them. But then I like looking back at ordinary days and feeling grateful that we have some memory of the mundane.

This weekend was my first summer Friday for the season! It's my favorite perk of my job. I got home early and Mandy and I took Kippy for an afternoon walk to get McDonald's iced coffee and people watch at the park.

On Saturday Mandy and I got pedicures while Dan took Kip for a stroll. Then Dan and I headed to a church picnic. It was HOT and the first time Kip has really been outside in that kind of heat. He kept him in the shade but his cheeks still turned bright red and his head was sweaty. 

He didn't seem to mind the heat too much and he was loved on by his church fan club. He also finally noticed a dog! I've been trying to get him to notice dogs on the street and he was never interested. At the picnic, Moses (our friend's golden retriever) was very gentle with Kip and suddenly it clicked. Kippy kept sticking his hands in his hair and letting Moses lick him. He would squeal and reach his hands out. It was super cute.

We didn't stay long due to the heat and then headed back home to try and get Kip to nap before the next picnic event for the day. He napped longer than expected and we just couldn't get it together to head out into the heat again.

On Sunday the weather turned gloomy and rainy. I had brunch team so we got to church super early again and didn't leave until super late. Naps were a disaster which is becoming an unfortunate trend on Sundays. Back at home, Kip was getting into everything.

Dan had Monday off from work and I loved having the day with just my boys. Unfortunately, Kip is teething really badly right now and not sleeping great, so no one slept-in. We just hung around the apartment and went on several nice walks during the day. It was warm but not hot so we strolled a lot.

That evening we got invited over to our friend's rooftop for an early dinner and we managed to Kip keep up past his bedtime without any major meltdowns.

He is perfectly happy as long as he can get into things unrestricted. 

Brooklyn Heights in Black and White

On Sunday, while Dan was helping with church set-up, Kip and I went for a nice walk around the neighborhood. The church we attend meets in downtown Brooklyn where several really beautiful neighborhoods intersect. Brooklyn Heights is particularly lovely with old Brownstones and really charming homes. My phone was nearly dead but I snapped some pictures while trying not to look too strange. I made them black and white because it just added a bit more old-timey charm. I'll have to go back to try and get some more.

Happy Friday!!!

Nine Months of Fatherhood

***Surprise blog post written by Dan!!

As I write this, I am just struck in awe of this baby boy!

I always wanted kids. I always grew-up with younger cousins and since high school, I've always enjoyed playing games with younger children and into college and adulthood, I frequently participated in leading lots of kids camps, youth events, and Sunday school classes. I'm comfortable with toddlers through high school aged students but I had very little experience with babies before Kippy was born.

The arrival of Kippy was both joyous and special, but also made me feel somewhat nervous because I didn't know how to do anything - even how to hold a newborn! Although I was hesitant at first, I am proud that I figured out how to hold him, change him, give him a bath, and feed him.

Reflecting on these last nine months, I wanted to remember these particular memories about Kippy:

1) How tiny you were when you were born and how excited we were to take you home from the hospital.

2) How you love to look around and see everything. Nothing seems boring or old to you it is all new and exciting. Even from a very early age you were always observing.

3) The time when you were a few weeks old and I was bouncing up and down on the yoga ball trying to get you to settle down, you had just had a bottle and I guess I bounced too much and you spit up all down my back and onto the ball and floor.

4) How strong you are! From holding your head up to the time I was feeding you and you grabbed the nearby lamp stand and tried to pull it over!

5) That funny memory when I got up to change your diaper in the middle of the night while Mommy was still asleep and we were both startled by a noise. We turned the light on and you had projectile pooped all over me. We laughed about it later but it was shocking in the moment.

6) How cute you are when you feed yourself food. You clutch a big fistful or pinch a small piece in your fingers and direct it to your mouth, and sometimes all over your face.

7) How determined you were to sit-up and eventually crawl. You would get up on your knees and sway back and forth, fall on your belly, and then get up and try again.

8) How whenever I do a silly voice or make a silly face, you light-up and laugh!

9) How much you love going for walks outside but you get so angry when we try to strap you in the stroller. You haven't figured out that the stroller means a walk.

I love watching you grow and look forward to many milestones ahead. 

Weekending

Gosh the weekends go so fast and I feel like there wasn't near enough accomplished or near enough time to relax.

Mandy spent the night on Friday so Dan and I could stop by a friend's birthday party after work. On Saturday we all headed into New Jersey. It was a rainy, glum day but we made the best. Dan and I got all set-up with a small storage unit near Mandy's apartment. We finally just decided to go for it. Now we can stash all the baby gear that Kip has outgrown, store our Christmas decorations, camping gear, and all the A/C units (in the winter). It was pricey (cheaper than Brooklyn) but worth the extra space we now have in the apartment.

After that business, we went to lunch at Cheesecake factory. Kippy does really well at restaurants right now which is great and I expect that might change soon so we'll take advantage while we can.

Following lunch, we strolled the mall and picked-up Dan's new suit. Kip fell asleep in the car and since he hadn't taken a good nap we decided to drive around instead of getting him out of the car again. 

Mandy and Dan found a state park nearby and we drove through it. I think it was called Cheesequake State Park which was a weird name. Or maybe that's wrong and I just had cheesecake on the brain. Anyways, it was beautiful and lush and green thanks to all the rain we got this week. We are looking forward to going back on a sunny day this summer. I took a quick picture through the window of the moving car.

After a quick stop at Mandy's apartment we drove back to Brooklyn.

On Sunday, Dan had Welcome Team so we got to church really early and I walked around the neighborhood with Kip until it was time for service. The sun finally came out and it was gorgeous. After church we did our usual Trader Joe's grocery run and then back to Bay Ridge. Sunday nights always feel like a scramble with laundry and dinner and trying to squeeze in some down time after Kip goes to bed. Most weeks we struggle to get everything done but this week we succeeded and had nearly two hours to relax and watch a movie.

Peeks from the Week

Woooof! This week has been rough.

Kip is teething and so sleep has been rocky. Multiple night wakings which require him to cry-it-out because he gets more upset if we go into the room to assist and then leave again. Teething, separation anxiety, and just development in general is hard right now. But, he is happy as can be in the morning regardless of how little sleep we all got. He is also pulling up now and tomorrow he will be moving into his college dorm. Good grief! Why is year one so flipping fast?

On Monday Kip had his 9 month well-check. He weighs 20 lbs and is 30 inches long! A tooth on the bottom (his third) poked through on Monday as well. He got one shot and a finger prick lead test. As result of all of that, he was excessively clingy all day Monday, basically had to be touching me at all times.

Also this week we've had consistent monsoon weather. Zero sunshine for several days and even temperatures back in the 50s. WHAT! The weather really plays with my mood so I'm sure everyone around me is hoping for sunshine as well. Work has been weighing heavily on both Dan and I and we both feel a little unhappy and a lot stuck. Sigh.

But, it's Friday and you know, somehow we'll manage. Happy weekend!

Weekending it

We had a lovely Mother's Day weekend and I felt very spoiled and loved.

Friday night I got to have a mom's night out with some church friends at one of my favorite restaurants in the neighborhood.

On Saturday Dan got up with Kip and let me sleep-in until Kip was hangry. I nursed him and then we all got a morning nap. Then we got around and headed to IKEA and Home Depot to pick-up some stuff for the apartment. In the afternoon Dan helped a friend move and Kippy and I went for a walk and did some shopping for Auntie Jessy's birthday.

Dan let me sleep in AGAIN on Sunday! Sleeping-in isn't the same as it used to be but let me tell you, even 30 minutes of extra sleep is bliss. We got Kip all gussied up and spent a solid 10 minutes trying to get a good picture of him with my Mother's Day flowers from Dan.

Attempts:

Success:

And then in the car ride to church he blew-out his outfit and we had to change in the car before walking in. So no cute family photo. Sigh.

After church we went to Dekalb Market (a fancy food hall) with cousin Kourtney and enjoyed some delicious barbecue and ice cream before heading to Trader Joe's for groceries.

Afternoon naps were a bust but otherwise our day was great. I got some lovely cards and gift cards from my parents and Dan, Mandy got me a shopping spree to the Loft, my first Willow Tree figure from Terri Mom, and a huge bouquet of flowers from Jessy. It was a special day.

And look what Kippy made me! Oh my heart. A sweet little hand print for my desk at work (thank you, Mandy, for helping him with this treasure).

9 Months In | 9 Months Out

Kip turned nine months old this week and I'm having a really hard time wrapping my head around the fact that he has been out in this world, living and growing, for as long as he was tucked inside me. The nine months of the pregnancy felt so long and punctuated. So many moments are crystal clear in my memory - time seemed to stretch endlessly in anticipation. Comparatively, these last nine months with a baby have felt so fast and blurred. Most moments are fuzzy in my memory - time cascading into a wash of diapers, breast milk, sleep deprivation, and crying all pooled together. Only a few moments winning in clarity. Everything mixed together with the most acute sense of love and joy.

On August 13, 2017. Three days after Kip was born. At 4:53 AM, I typed out a tiny note on my phone. I had just finished pumping. Dan and Kip were asleep in our room. My parents asleep in the living room. Me, wide awake but completely exhausted in Kip's room. I was battling with myself mentally. My brain felt like mud and I had this sense of pending doom. A brief moment of sanity when I recognized that things would get A LOT more difficult before I would feel like a human being again. And all these things I had read and heard from other mom's about how it all goes so fast, and how hard it will be, and how babies don't keep. I heard all of that replaying in my brain.
This is what I wrote:
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Don't rush anything. You'll miss it when it's gone. Every moment counts for something, even if it isn't perfect.
Newborn is a short phase. You'll look back and wish you had one more night where he slept on your chest or one more midnight feed. It sucks now but your future self will look back on it as gold. Treasure it for her.

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It was all true and I knew it would be and yet that future self, me, right now in this moment  - nine months later... She's sad. Sad because I didn't treasure it for her. Or rather, didn't treasure it enough or really I didn't know how I could. That I looked too far into the future or focused too much on the unknown that I didn't truly soak it in. That I didn't see the seconds slipping away. That I was too tired and worried about everything else that I couldn't stop and just be IN the present. And I still haven't figured out how.

It seems fitting that this milestone of nine months is coinciding with Mother's Day. Last year I was almost seven months pregnant and Dan and I were on our babymoon in Boston. I count that as my first Mother's Day because I truly feel like every woman is a mother the instant that tiny egg begins to form. But it wasn't until the moment I pulled Kip onto my chest when he was first born that I really felt the weight of that title, literally and figuratively. Mother.

I can't really say anything about motherhood that hasn't already been said by women far more poetic and experienced than me. And I know I have a lot left to learn and many more mistakes to make, so in many ways I don't feel equipped to say anything about motherhood at all. But with the benefit of some hindsight I like to look back on that day that Kip was born, the day before actually, when Dan and I hustled over to the hospital. So excited and so ready. I'm proud of that girl. And I'm proud of Dan. We were and remain clueless about what we're doing, but somehow I think we're figuring it out just fine.

So, happy 9 months Kippy! And happy Mother's Day to all the mamas out there...to the ones who bore, to the ones who raise, and to the ones who help us bear the burden.

And just for kicks:

Nine months out - One week out - Nine months in