Our method was based on a modification of the advice offered in this book:
Plus a TON of reliance on Mandy and her experience having already potty trained four boys. She is our guru and I attribute this early success to her expertise plus the general readiness of Kip.
Mandy has been talking to Kip about going on the potty since birth. No joke. It was part of her strategy from day one to repeatedly show Kip the toilet. Show him how it works. Show him how we use it. And talk to him about one day using it too. We purchased a little potty seat and a toddler potty back at the end of last year and allowed Kip to get used to it in his space and try it out if he wanted...without pressure.
We read potty books and celebrated every time anyone when potty. We watched for readiness signs and just after he turned 2 1/2 we picked a week to try the 3 block method outlined in the book (full disclosure, I didn't read the book - Mandy practically memorized it). I say we went with a modified version of the advice in this book because Mandy has some issues with some of the advice, primarily the age they recommend starting to train. We waited to start Kip until after we finished the big bed transition and when he had enough verbal communication skills to tell us when he needed to go. He was NOT ready during the window of time the book suggests. So we waited.
Here are the basics of the method in this book: Block One - You keep the child nude throughout the day and remain that way until accidents stop (this can take one day or a week+). You stay close to home and as the adult you never take your eyes of the child. Watch for go signs and direct them to the potty. Once they've begun to recognize their own body signs and stop having accidents while pantsless, they are ready for Block Two. Kip was in Block One for 1/2 a day. Within the first several hours of going nude, he was already taking himself to sit on the potty. He had ZERO accidents and Mandy could tell he was ready. This was Mandy's expertise. She could tell he was ready for more of a challenge. I would have probably kept him nude longer but I let Mandy lead the way and she was right. This was Day 1:
On day two, Kip started Block Two. Block Two is commando with pants on. This block lasts approximately one month. During naps and nighttime Kip will wear a diaper or pull-up but when he is awake he only has his pants on. Nothing underneath. This is to help him rely on his body to alert him to when he needs to go. Without the comfort of a tight-fitting undergarment, which feels like a diaper, the child can still feel the urges and recognize when an accident happens. Mandy is insistent. NO PULL-UPS during potty training. A pull-up is essentially a diaper and it feels exactly like one to a toddler. They cannot feel when the pull-up is wet as well as they can when their pants become soaked. This was Day 2:
The book suggests the child remain in Block Two for approximately one month. They need to stop having accidents and be either verbalizing when they need to go or better yet, taking themselves. This can take a long time because it varies day to day and how busy you are and what the child is doing. Are they distracted? Are they comfortable going outside of the house? Will they hold or do they go constantly? We thought initially we would do the Block Two until he could go two weeks without accidents. But now that we are two weeks into the entire process and one week accident free, we decided to stick with the book and keep going commando. The commando phase is easy because you don't even notice and neither does the child. They get used not not wearing a diaper and without introducing a tight fitting pair of underwear, the child continues to build confidence in trusting their body. Once this is fully established (hopefully around a month) then they move to Block Three which is introducing underwear.
Now, we've been impressed with Kip's progress and I admit, I was really hoping Kip would be a potty prodigy for Mandy's sake. She feels like she has potty training PTSD from a particular experience with one particular child she trained. I didn't want Kip to be a repeat so I am really proud of how well he is doing considering he is still quite young. Boys are supposed to take longer to train and while we have friends with kids around his age that are training, we know many more that are older than him and not trained. Every child is different and you never know how they will take to the process.I really have no advice on how to tell they are ready. You'll have to talk to Mandy for that.
This past weekend when I was solo with Kip for essentially four days, I worked really hard on not telling him to go but rather reminding him to listen to his body. If I asked if he needed to go and he said no, then I trusted him. It was hard but he proved to me that he would tell me when he was ready or would respond yes when I asked. This is a big step because it shows that he is aware of his body signals and not just relying on an adult to schedule his bathroom breaks. It also helps them practice self directing when they are distracted. Most of Kip's accidents have happened when he is distracted and not paying attention. I don't think we are out of the woods in this sense. His last accident was at a friend's house and he dropped his full bladder. There were a few circumstances to that accident that weren't really his fault but it was a good indicator for us that he isn't quite there yet.
I don't want this to seem like it has been a perfect processes. It hasn't. Kip has had accidents of both varieties and while pee has been fairly smooth, poop has not. Kip has generally always been extremely regular. Until we started training, he never went more than two days without at least one poopy diaper. I know this because we logged it. Now since training he will hold it and not go for several days. We've tried up-ing his water intake and fiber but simultaneously he is teething and therefore not eating a ton. He is getting backed-up.
So we started a sticker chart and reward system to help motivate him to go number 2. We didn't really do rewards for pee because he wasn't interested in them and we figured why bother? With poop, he is responding better with some incentive.
So far he has earned two Lego toys (we didn't stick to the 3=toy rule exactly) and he will get a sucker any time goes poop in the potty. He wants those things and he sits and tries really hard to go in order to get them. BUT, the poop is hard and it is hard for toddlers to let go so we haven't had a ton of opportunities for success. But, Kip does seem to understand the concept and he has seen the reaction when he is successful. This part will just take more time and hopefully not too many suckers.
This weekend my parents are in town so it will be interesting to see how he does with other people around and if we go out of the house for a long period of time. I don't expect perfection and I think that is one of the most important things. It's a messy process and eventually he will get there. In the meantime, pack extra pants and socks and hold your tongue when something starts running down their leg.
We aren't touching nighttime training for awhile. He is still wearing diapers to bed and while he wakes up dry 90% of the time and has actually woken up in the night and requested to go potty, we aren't pushing that part of the process until he has a solid footing with wearing underwear during the day. I'll post another update about that once we get there.
And, yeah, I know...once the potty training is over we need to work on dropping the pacifier. One thing at a time people!!
