First Trimester Recap

I plan on sharing our whole "getting pregnant journey" but that could take some time, so today, I'm going share about some of our first trimester. This is mainly for memory sake (hello, first baby) but also for family since we kept so many details a secret during this critical window. I'll spread the posts out so it isn't so baby heavy over here.

I've always been really conscious of the chances of miscarriages and I've known a lot of people who have had miscarriages. Since I'm a naturally anxious person coupled with my generally "realist" perspective of life, I just expect that if something bad could happen, it will. Add that to my crazy reproductive system history (I'll share more on that later), and it's easy to see why I was worried about a miscarriage. I pretty much assumed I would miscarry. Now, I know most people think that is a horrible perspective to have going into a pregnancy, but you aren't me. It's a lifetime worth of coping habits I developed to avoid disappointment. I always have hope that things will work out fine, and we pray all the time for a healthy growing baby, but we are cautious to protect our hearts from loss.

Anyways, at Thanksgiving my parents and sisters were visiting us and I told them we had been trying to get pregnant and we were near certain we hit the right window of time. I told my mom one night, "mom, there could be a baby inside of me right now!" and she grabbed my stomach and said "oh hello baby, I'm your grandma." We were both kinda of kidding and I don't think either of us actually thought I was pregnant but as it turned out, I was! The first person to welcome the baby to life was my joking mom!

The week after Thanksgiving, Dan and I were at our marriage counseling session and we shared that we had been trying and our counselor told us to get a pregnancy test when we got home because there was a good chance I was pregnant. At this point I was still about three days away from when I was supposed to start my period. I was super skeptical but we bought two boxes of tests (4 tests total). I ruined the first test by not following the directions correctly (good job Steph that was $7 down the toilet). The next morning I took the second test and the faintest pink line appeared. I didn't believe it so I got in the shower. After I showered, I took the test into the bedroom and asked Dan if he thought it was a line (real creative right?). He agreed it was a line but we were both in the twilight zone at that point.

The next two days I took the other two tests and both had the faint pink line.  Of course we were excited but also extremely shocked. It will make more sense once I share about my crazy reproductive system. I had convinced myself for so long that I was going to have to do In Vitro Fertilization or at least that we would have to try for months and months on end. I was not prepared to get pregnant that quickly. God was probably laughing at me as I imagine He does when I try to control my life and think I know all the answers.

I told my sisters immediately because I knew I wouldn't be able to keep it a secret from them and then I made an appointment immediately with the fertility specialist I had been seeing. She did blood work to confirm the pregnancy and then I came back a few days later to check the blood work again to get an exam. She was SO happy for us that I sort of think she also suspected that fertility would be an issue for me. I went back about a week and a half later (week before Christmas) to get an internal ultrasound.

Since I only have one Fallopian tube (again, more on that later) I was at a higher risk for developing an Ectopic pregnancy. And I was told after my surgery that I needed to go in and have an ultrasound early to make sure the fetus was in my uterus and not the tube. Here is the first picture we got of our little baby!!! It's just a blob!

It was perfectly positioned! Another miracle.

Still cautious but optimistic, we started thinking of ways we would tell our parents the good news. Since it was approaching Christmas we decided to buy a pair of blue baby shoes and a pair of pink. Wrap-up one of each color in a box and put it under the Christmas tree for our parents. My sister's delivered the package to my parents to open on Christmas morning and Dan and I got to give the gift to Terri Mom and Allen Dad when we were in Kansas. We have both reactions recorded. I'm really grateful my sisters were able to keep the secret beforehand and get my parent's reaction on film in our absence. We asked everyone to keep it a secret until we could announce after the 12 week window.

Outside of telling our immediate family, we did not do much during the first trimester due to my miscarriage anxiety. It was just easier for me not to think about it too much, buy or plan anything, or attach too much. I would catch myself daydreaming about baby clothes or something and then force myself to block that from my mind. We pretty much lived life like normal except for avoiding the bad pregnancy foods and drinks. I'd been taking a prenatal vitamin for over a year (recommended by my doctor) so even that wasn't new to the routine.

Right after the New Year, we had another appointment with the specialist to make sure things were looking good. I was 8 weeks at this point and we got another ultrasound and heard the heartbeat for the first time.

Since everything looked good I was referred to my regular OB from then on. I was sad to not be able to stay with my favorite doctor. She always took every question as serious and important, she never made me feel stupid or unwanted and she has the best bedside manner I've ever witnessed. But since she is a doctor for fertility issues and not an OB, I had to move down the hall to the other office.

Two weeks later I had my first appointment with my regular OBGYN. I had not seen her in about a year for my last annual appointment and I was not happy with her at that time. Let me tell you, non-pregnant woman are chopped liver when it comes to OBGYN offices. I was always given terrible appointment times, had to wait incredibly long in the room, and only ever got 10 minutes with the doctor. I also always felt like my questions were stupid and rushed. But, when you are pregnant you get treated like royalty. A total 180 in terms of treatment. The first appointment we had was an hour long and with the doctor for 45 minutes!!! She did an ultrasound and took a TON of blood for different tests.

The ultrasound machine they have in the regular office seemed ancient compared to the one in the specialists office (there's your increased co-payment right there). That's why this photo has such poor clarity.

Since I opted for the additional genetic testing (recommended for first pregnancy) I was scheduled to go to the hospital to get another more in-depth ultrasound a few weeks later. That was a really cool experience because the technician pointed out all the developing organs like the bladder and the stomach and showed me the brain. She made the baby move around and I saw its tiny foot stick up. So cute! These ultrasound pics were so detailed and made the baby look like it was practically full grown but at that point it was only 12 weeks and still so tiny.

I took this picture of a little desk critter I have on my desk which is the approximate size of the baby at 12 weeks when I got the ultrasound above. SO SMALL!!!

So by the end of the first trimester we have practically a whole album of ultrasound images. I didn't realize this was unusual but I'm not complaining. It's my favorite part so far.

Other than the doctor appointments I didn't really research much or prepare anything. I kept minimum documentation in this little book that Jessy sent me and I took exactly 1 "bump" picture. I didn't wear any maternity clothing during the first trimester and we didn't purchase anything for the baby. In the next recap post I'll go over the symptoms I experienced and other exciting baby news from the first trimester.